The Raffles Girl

Went for swimming training this evening. Did 1*300m, then 4*350m. Followed by 4*50m (25m choice stroke, 25m free) 70% effort. And end of training!
But a statement was made during training today by one of the swimmers. Actually it's the first time i saw her at training. Other then knowing that she is rather good, and a national athlete, i do not know her all that well. But one thing we had in common was that she was a Raffles girl. During training, while we were chatting in the middle of a set, she made this comment. How come the rest time is more then the swim. Frankly speaking, i would suppose a statement like this would piss some people off. But as with everything, i see two sides of the coin here.
To speak for her, i would totally agree with her. Training is just training. What's the purpose of going for training? To work out and get better at whichever sport we do. And if, at training, you're not pushing yourself hard, then obviously you won't see results or improvements. Or you might see results eventually, but with a longer time frame and curve. So i guess if i put myself in the shoes of a serious athlete, who came down to train, then i would be pissed as well. And i would be rather upset that here are bunch of athletes who are spending more time talking then swimming. Probably like how i felt after one of the beach swim session we had.
To speak against her, then i suppose she could have choosen to swim in another lane if she felt that we were not all that serious about training. I guess to a certain degree, i felt it was disrespectful to be saying that to the coach, given the circumstances of which this training was about. Here was a guy, who gave his time freely, to get a group of people together to train. And he doesn't even get paid. He does it out of his own good will. So, i suppose if she was unhappy, she could have left at any time or not turn up for swims in future.
But i guess the incident was carried over to dinner where we did touch a little about the Raffles girl. Xiao Ying and I are both from Raffles. And there is a part of me that can really understand why she said what she did. I suppose it stems out from the fact that i went through a Raffles education program. In school, we were thought to think and more importantly, to speak up when things weren't right. We were thought to do our best in whatever we chose to do. At trainings, i remember we pushed ourselves hard. There was no such thing as failing. I remember in sec3, when we were training for cross country, the team would get together to run before school starts. And that was like at 6.30 in the morning, so that we could clock at least 5km before morning assembly. And we did that not because our coach asked us to, but because we all wanted to win.
Excuses and slacking off wasn't tolerated. And everyone had a high standard that we aimed to achieve. That was also the year where we felt that we had a remote chance of winning the cross country title. But that was how we were brought up to think.
And so, the Raffles education really brought out the best in most of us. And that is evident from the number of high flyers we see and the high number of people who succeed in their own field. It was being told that we were the best, the cream of the crop, that we would one day be very successful and we were all going to be leaders in our own field. More importantly, it was a point that was driven home by almost every teacher we had. Daughters of a better age. But i guess what was flawed in the Raffles program was that we weren't taught to be empathetic. We weren't thought to be considerate to the feelings of others and those around us. Being empathetic was a sign of weakness. Was there really ever a good reason for not doing as well as expected? Was it merely an EXCUSE? And while we were taught to be the best, we forget that around us, there are those who are not as fortunate as us girls. There are those whom, if given the right opportunity and chance, might be better then us. But the flip side is, we generally think we worked our ass off for it anyway.
So, i guess the debate will always carry on. For myself, i have toned down a lot since my secondary school days. I'm no longer as arrogant only because i have come to understand that there will always be a bigger fish out there. I can be the biggest fish in my little pond, but when i move to a bigger pond, there will be a bigger fish. And often, it is better to be humble, and to learn from others. Pick out the stuff that you like and improve on them, and discard those that you don't like. And being empathetic is not an excuse for me. It is being able to understand the situation and circumstances that others are in. Of course, it doesn't stop me from giving my best coz as long as i carry on and not tolerate excuses from myself, and set my standards high, i can still be great at what i do.
To end this note, i need to clarify that i have totally enjoyed my Raffles education. And if i could go back in time, i wouldn't change it for the world. If i have kids one day, i would want to put them through the same education i received if i had a chance. But of course, i would also teach them about dealing with people. And failing once does not mean being a failure for life. And that end of the day, it is one thing to be successful, great, talented, smart etc, and yet, it is still important to be humble and willing to learn and listen to others.

Sundown Swimathon

Sundown Swimathon was an event held by NTU lifesaving corp for Charity. And i was there! Yup! The swim event started out at with dinner at 8pm, and the briefing at 8.45pm. We were flagged off at 10pm for the start of the swim. Supposed to last till 7am in the morning. So it was a 9hr swim session. We registered ourselves as the Tanjong Beach Swim Team, with team members from Trifam.

Team Tanjong Beach (left to right): Chen Munn, Me, Ling Er, Andy, Toh Min

Our group was really a mix a match really. And prior to the event, we had two swimmers pull out. Luckily for us, Andy and Ling Er stepped up to the challenge if not, we would not have been able to take part at all. So the plan was for us to take turns to swim and finish as many laps as possible. Our initial target was to do 20km as a team, that means each of us were supposed to do 4km. Our primary aim was to complete the event and have fun! We were definitely not a very competitive team.
It was a first experience for all of us, swimming through the night, and doing so many laps in one session. But we're glad we completed it and all had fun.
Started out with doing 500m sets. So it was 10 laps each, before the next swimmer takes over. Munn started as the first swimmer, Ling Er carried on, then Toh Min, Myself and finally Andy. The first 10 laps was probably everyone's slowest split. But we took it as a warm up and carried on. We got better and by the time it was 00:30hrs, we had completed 69 laps between us. That worked out to about 6.9km. At that time, there was a leaderboard, and we were 3rd from below. There was a total of 16 teams that took part, so we were 14th at 00:30hrs. And as the night wore on, many were starting to tire. We were starting to get hit by the Zzzz monster when it was close to 3am. And at 3am, the next set of laps were being counted. We were still 3rd from the back and we managed to do 68 more laps in that 2 1/2 hrs. So at that time, we already knew we were on target to complete the goal which we had set for ourselves.
And i'm super proud of my team. Coz in the next 2 1/2 hrs when everyone was super tired and really struggling to keep awake, we managed to up our pace and did even more laps. We did change our strategy though, as we noticed that it was getting colder and some were being to feel more tired. So, we did sets of 400m, then 300m then 200m. And we played around with the numbers so that it would not be as boring. And finally, when 7am came, our team as a whole had completed 24.4km. Ahead of the target we had set for ourselves. Munn, Ling Er and myself had swam 5km each and Andy and Toh Min both did 4.7km. So, everyone had managed to swim more laps then when we had targeted. Our final position was 13 out of 16 teams!


Pictures courtesy of Janice our only supporter who doubled up as our photographer!

I had a great time at the swimathon. It surely was an experience for me and for some of the other team members. Swimming at night is no joke. The air was cold, especially since it has been raining for the last week. The water was cold at 2am in the morning. We were not only fighting with muscle fatigue, we had to fight the Zzzz monster off. And we still managed to do better then our set target. Great job guys!
Some things i would probably like to improve on for myself is my swim technique and also my endurance underwater. But for now, a good job well done everyone!

Updates

Its been days since i last blogged and have missed doing so. Thought i'll drop in to give a couple of updates. No training this whole week as yet because of the dreaded rain. I am slightly irritated by it right now. How can it rain for 2 days non-stop in March? That is so wrong. Was sharing with some friends whom i met for dinner last night that i used to be able to ride my bike from March to Novemeber minus the occassional rain. Last year, from July onwards, i didn't ride as much coz the weather was mostly unpredictable. No more sunny days! And that gets me upset! I love sunny days. Don't mind running, swimming, biking and riding my baby in the scorching sun. But the rain... Oh.... Irritating. Although truth be told, if not for the fact that i just recovered from flu, i quite enjoy running when it drizzles. The feeling of the rain lightly tapping on me has a calming effect. And not only that, the air always smells fresher when rain is around the corner.
But with the swimathon coming on Friday, i'm worried that i have not been swimming all week coz of the rain. For the record, i know i am going to get wet eventually when i plunge into the pool and swim, so it doesn't really matter if it's raining or sunny. But it generally feels colder when it rains. And that's why i always make it a point to swim on sunny days. Of course, if the rain persists, i might just FORCE myself to go to the pool later. Guess if this keeps up, there'll be no run this evening as well. Haven't ran for close to 2 weeks. This is unacceptable. Sighz
Met the Samba kids for dinner last night. Actually not really Samba kids. about 7 of us turned up for dinner, Xuan, Jiahui, Suan, Banz, Debs, Dylan and myself. It was a nice catching up session. More so coz Debs just announced that she is pregnant. And i had a great time catching up with little sis Xuan as always =)
Samba girls(3 of us anyway)
Then went off to meet the guys and girl who would be doing the swimathon together this Friday. Settled some logistics stuff and basically just had a discussion on what to bring, wear and food that we need. Keeping my fingers crossed and will be praying hard for it to not be raining tomorrow evening. Already swimming in the night would mean lower temperatures. And cold is something that i'm not very good with. I'll still swim of course, but nothing beats having a nice weather.
So basically, that has been the week as a whole. Moved more stuff back from office over week and set up shop at home. There's a major reshuffling going on in office and have been told that in the not so far future, we would be moving office. Our current room is going to be acquired by another team. And everyone shares tables in the new office coz there's too many people and too little space. So i figured, basically, i go into office just to print stuff and submit cases. Other then that, i don't spend all that much time there. Why not buy a printer, bring the laptop home, and i can effectively work at home. So when i went to the IT fair on Sunday, i bought myself the same printer that i use in office, and now i can safely say i can work from home. Will take a picture of the revamped room later. Once i manage to pack everything up properly.
Well, that's about it for Sunday till today. Will post pics up later.

Fav verse

Have been meaning to put this up for the longest of time. Not sure if i've ever put this on my blog. But i remember this used to be my favorite verse while i was in competitive sports.

Even youths grow tired and weary,
And young men stumble and fall;
But those who hope in the LORD
Will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
They will run and not grow weary,
They will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:30-31

IT fair

Woke up late in the morning and decided to head with Dad to the IT show at Suntec. Despite his warnings, i decided to try my luck at Suntec to see if there would be parking lots. And while we were coming down Sheares Bridge, i knew it was a mistake! But managed to cut out to head towards Bugis after 10 mins. So it wasn't really too bad. Found a lot, and walked over to Suntec instead. Decided to give ourselves 4 hours and i remembered telling dad, it was more then sufficient to finish seeing the show.
Grabbed lunch quickly and headed to the convention centre! Oh my, it was so swamped with people it was scary. But all in all, we still managed to walk around despite the crowd. And 3.5 hours was really not enough to cover the whole place. But i did managed to buy myself a laser printer and a digital camera.
My new toy!

The Water Horse

Went to catch a movie last night at Marina Square! Has been a while since i last watched a movie. Maybe the last time i caught a show was in November 2007? Hee. After i came home from the Tanjong Beach swim and morning cycle, i slept for like 4 hours. Then woke up around dinner time and decided that i really wanted to go out and catch up with friends. Something that i have not been doing for a long time already. So i texted Superman to find out just what they were up to and decided to go watch a movie together.
The movie was pretty interesting, and heart warming. Although the ending was a little off from my expectations. Not as in a twist sort of thing, but rather it was a little anti climax. Anyway, it talks about a little boy, finding an egg, that hatches into the water horse. And a friendship is forged between these two unlikely duo. I guess what was sweet in the show was the contrast of how such a huge creature was actually very gentle.
Headed back to chill out and chat with Superman and wife after that before heading home. All in all, i would say it was a nice break and enjoyable activity after not watching movies for a while. =)

The week on a whole

Was sick, so missed Singapore Biathlon. The week on a whole was crappy. The flu refused to go away, so i was forced to take and extended break from training. Which irritated me to no end, coz i kept thinking all the hard work the past couple of months has effectively gone down the drain. Sighz...
Had my first agency meeting this week. Tues i think. Wasn't too bad. In fact i was rather looking forward to it. Which was funny coz i've never thought i would miss agency meetings. But it was good coz we've finally sat down and talked, i've finally found out who my new colleagues are. 4 of us in the team so far. And i'm the only Chinese. The rest are Indians. I'm sure this is God's way of teaching me to be tolerant of other races =P
I've also sorted out my clothes cupboard, went IKEA and bought some stuff to organize the cupboard, all my clothes fit nicely now and there is no longer a mess from the previous 'too-small' cupboard.
Bought my cleats and cycling shoes. Went for a cycle the other day. Was damn worried i would fall down, but didn't. Thank goodness. Went for a long ride this morning as well. Eh, my long ride is like 30km. From home, to bukit batok swimming pool, up bukit batok, to jalan jurong kechil, to dunearn road, to leonie road, to thomson road, to mandai, pass the zoo, pass by hillview before turning into bukit batok road again, and home. The roads were clear, as compared to the other day when i rode in the evening. Anyway, i woke up at 3.45am, left my place at 4.20am, and reached home by 7 am. Need to speed up, i just pray hard that cycling is like swimming and running. Mileage, mileage, mileage!
Was supposed to close a case this week. Last minute, the guy backed out! So i'm a couple of cases short for last month. Coz this guy was supposed to get 3 policies. One endowment, one insurance and his CPF investment. Sigh. Need to watch this roll over effect. If this keeps on, i'm going to have a huge shortfall towards the end of the year again.
Went for Tanjong Beach swim this morning. As usual, company was great! But, i suppose when company is good, you tend to spend more time talking then training and that is how i feel training went today! Every lap we did, we took almost a 10min break, coz people were chatting.. Sighz... Finished 6 laps, with lots of rest in between!
Nothing much left for this week i suppose.
Doing a charity swim next Fri evening to Sat morning! 10pm to 7am. To raise funds for the Singapore Children's Society. Team of 5 person to take turns to swim continuously! Should be fun i guess and still be able to play my part for charity.
Another wedding to attend next week!

Pissed with myself

I'm so absolutely pissed with myself. Of all days, i had to wake up in the morning with a stuffed nose and coughing my lungs out! I missed the Singapore Biathlon. And i was so looking forward to it. Why i fell sick? I guess i could come up with a couple of reasons off the top of my head. Not enough sleep and rest. The fact that i was constantly tired would have been indication to me that my body was stressed and needed rest. Maybe it was being garang and wanting to complete the 9km run in the rain on Thursday even when i knew i was already feeling a little unwell, rather then turning back and avoiding the rain. Hmmm
Wonder which was it. But all in all, i'm damn pissed off with myself coz there are no more biathlons for this year. Until end of the year for NIE biathlon. Sighz... Oh well, maybe a good time to improve my run and swim and to get the biking right.
Have been in bed all weekend, might go see the doctor tomorrow if the symptoms still persist. Damn i hate being sick!

Target for Singapore Biathlon

Ok, quick note before i sleep.
Swim time: 36min
Run time: 1 hr
Transition time: 3 min

Finish run without stopping.

Off to bed!

Hmmmm

Obviously i can't think of a title for this post. So decided to name it hmmm.
Have been so tired and exhausted lately. Don't feel like working out, don't feel like doing anything. My favorite activity involves my bed, my pillow and me on it. Sigh. So, basically, up till today, for this week, i have not done anything other then to go for a 21km cycle. Which is damn sad lah.
So, today, i told myself that no matter how tired i felt, no matter, how not in the mood i felt, i must go and work out. So hit the pool, albeit reluctantly, and swam. Didn't finish my workout, did half of it. In worse times then last week. Which is bad. Seems the slacking has turned into a 10s lag time in each lap. Anyway, i think i could have finished the workout if i had planned my time better, ie. got out of the house earlier so i could complete the workout. But i didn't i was half minded about swimming, so only left the house and got to the pool with about 50 mins left to swim. Decided to do a ladder workout, 100m, 200m, 300m, 400m, 500m. That would have made it 1500m. But i ended up doing 200m short. Hee. actually, the work out was supposed to be after the 500m, then back down to 100m. which would mean a 2.5km swim. That's why i said i think i did about half the workout. Oh well....
Went running in the evening. And today while running, i had to relearn another lesson. Make hay while the sun shines. Stop procrastinating and stop being so lazy. was supposed to do the 11km run to Bishan park and back from TP Safra. But, because it started raining halfway, only ended up doing 8.5km. And it was a horrid 8.5km. Run pace was slower then last thur's 11km run. So basically, the lack of training all week has not helped me in any way, only to ensure that i would once again have to struggle up.
Still thinking of what goals i want to set for the Singapore Biathlon this Saturday. Haven't really figured it out yet. My timing for the NUS biathlon was actually better then i expected. Half worried that i wouldn't even be able to come close to that timing. Since the distance at NUS biathlon was actually 1km short. Hmmmm
I received a cd today. Was watching myself on tv. Seems i took part in some kiddy show while i was a kid, 5 yrs old. It was hilarious. The short clip was approximately 20mins long. And i think i spent 20 mins laughing non stop at myself. But i observed some things about myself through that short 20mins session.
1) I always made funny actions to divert attention away from the fact that i was shy or uncomfortable.
2) I had a very short attention span as a kid, got bored easily.
3) I was constantly in a world of my own when activities were boring
4) I was very competitive as a 5 year old
5) My people skills were horrid
6) I wasn't very smart
7) I wasn't very cute
Alright, these were some of the things i observed. So i guess, at 5, i was pretty much made for life already. Only no. 5 seems to have changed slightly over the years. The rest, pretty much still about the same. Damn.. And here i was thinking i was smart... Hmmm
Anyway, while we were watching the clip, Dad, Mum and I, mum was going on and on telling me what a rotten kid i was. That i was always really playful, rebellious, and probably a rather great troublemaker. That kidergarten teachers complained non stop about me. That while we were supposed to be sleeping, i would be up and about, trying to talk to other children, or 'disturbing' them as mum put it. Hey, i was just trying to be friendly... =P I guess the talkative part was cultivated really early...
Then she went on to tell me that i was never really keen about school. Never bother to pack my school bag before bed, always forgetting books and having to get Dad to send it to school, always forgetting to finish school assignments, didn't want to study for spelling and dictation. So i guess, for such a playful child, i did pretty alright through primary school. I suppose in today's context, i would probably have been labelled a troublemaker. No wonder in my short stint as a teacher, i had so many of these kids. Guess it's really true when they say what goes around, comes around. Ha...
Anyway, if not for the fact that Dad asked Mum to head to bed, i'm sure she could have gone on non stop as to what a troublesome kid, playful kid, naughty child i was. But, i guess i turned out alright after all. =) Oh, and my size, i was already taller then the rest of the children at 5. So, that's probably genetics. Nature. The rest... Still thinking whether its nature or nurture...
5)

Tired

I think this word sums up how i have been feeling all week. Initially i thought it was because i had not been sleeping enough or well. So i decided to turn in early over the weekend, and i didn't feel any better. In fact, it didn't help that i missed morning run this morning after i saved up my legs from yesterday's sentosa session coz i woke up late. Sighz...
In fact, the whole week has been pretty low for me. Somehow, i cannot find the energy to train or go through training feeling rather lousy. And to make things worse, no matter how much rest i get, i still seem to feel tired.
I am suspecting that my body is not resting enough, but i am getting my decent number of hours of sleep. Not sure what else there is to do. And both my run and swim time have taken a dip.
Weekend went by in a blur. Was catching some of the local trifam people taking part in the langkawi ironman, via internet. It was really inspiring. Saturday swim session was fun as well, although i probably should have done 2 more laps. But i didn't.
Sunday missed training. But went to help dad. Spent the whole day yawning. Gg to log off and Zzzzzzz
Oh... i bumped into TG today. =) Random...

Random thoughts

Training wise, it was a crappy session. Woke up feeling tired. But decided to drag myself to the pool. Planned on doing interval training. Didn't make it. Did some easy swim, 500m, then did 5*100. All within 2min. Then did another 500m easy and decided to call it a day. Seems like the runs are taking lots out of me.
Then came back, came online to see the Singapore biathlon website, only to realise that my name was not in the Woman's open listing, but in the Men's open. Hmm, this should be interesting. I always half suspected i was a Man trapped in a woman's body =P
Didn't have to head to office today coz there was nothing left to do after cramming everything that needed to be done yesterday. And the rest of the stuff, i brought home to do for the weekend, so decided it was time to bring my bike down to the bike shop to get the stuff that i needed to fix on, fitted. Spent an hour there, $208 poorer, and all i got was a helmet, two blinkers for my bike, front and back, and a speedometer.
Went to meet the girls for dinner after that. It was nice being together. Think this is the first session this year. Ger was there with Gwen. Amazing. Seems like just yesterday where we were still in sec 1. But now, all of us are grown up and there's even baby Gwen. After dinner, shopped around DFS with Serene and Ting. Saw a nice Gucci bag that i would consider buying, if it was LV. Liked the shape and size, but not too practical with me always being on the bike. Anyway, decided to call it a day after that since Wen called to say she wouldn't be able to meet up with us.
Wanted to go meet Superman after that, but his partying session was at midnight, which means i would not be able to rest enough for my swim tomorrow. And i figured after that crappy session today, i better swim tomorrow.
Was chatting with a guy at the bike shop, Ronnie, and i figured i get to finally call myself a sports newbie. I guess 5 years of not competing puts me back at the newbie status. It's always easiest to start the climb from the bottom. No expectations.
Well, i'll continue with what i want to write this weekend. I have some thoughts in my head, except that it's pretty jumbled at this point. Need to sort it out on my runs and i'll add them in!
Have a great weekend!

Test this out! Thought it was pretty accurate

http://www.goldinuniverse.com/

You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back... so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

You are a leader in every sense of the word. You know where you are going and you know what you need to do in order to get there. You exercise an inherent initiative in overcoming obstacles and difficulties. You either hold, or wish to achieve, a position of authority by means of which full control can be exerted over events.

You give the impression that you are a self-sufficient individual, pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain or pleasure. But this is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional person, one that may make hasty decisions and perhaps repent at leisure. It is time now perhaps to break the bond of detachment and become the real 'you' - the you that you would like to be.

It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.

You have so many ideas that you would like to revitalise but you need to realise a stable and peaceful condition to do so. Once you can free yourself from all the aggravation and tension around you, you will make strides that may amaze you. You will not be prevented from achieving all the things you so desire.

Does this sound like me? You tell me... Hee

Tired after run

Nothing much to write. I'm tired after the run today. And had a long long day at work, starting with agency meeting early in the morning, then lunch appt, then tea appt, before rushing home to grab my running gear to go running. But i guess i did well at the run today. Ran 11.08km, time 1hr 06min 42s, Pace 6min/km. Managed to keep in pace with this really consistent uncle for about 8km. I lost him at about 8km. No more energy. So pace took a dip then. But other then that, i guess i'm improving. At the expense of my swim. Haven't swam all week except Monday coz am taking a long time to recover from the long runs.. Nitez

I will love running

Testing out a new theory here. Figured if i tell myself often enough that i love running, i'll eventually love it. Seems all weird that i used to enjoy running so much in the past. But now, i struggle with it. Maybe not mentally as strong any more?
Anyway, went for run just now. Did approximately 9km. Took about 55mins. I'm pretty pleased actually. It is actually getting easier with each run. I guess that is good. I'm at the middle of the 2nd pack now. Will just have to train harder, work myself to the front of the 2nd pack and then progress to the first pack. Was actually at the front of the 2nd pack until i hit the slopes. Really have to work on those. Just thinking which slopes i should do... Anyway, i'm glad the runs are taking less effort now. But still don't really dare to push hard, coz worried cannot make it to the end. But i now have a better gauge how long more it is to the end, so pushing myself in the last km.
Eh, tried out the bike today. Learnt how to mount and dismount. It was a huge feat for me. Considering my great fear in toppling over. So, for that i deserve a pat on the back! *pat pat... Learnt how to change gears, make them work, get up the bike by doing the skate scooter action, brake, slide ass off the bike and put foot on floor. Of course without the cycling shoes. Actually feel a little more stable coz in my running shoes, i can actually tip toe and touch the ground. Kinda like cheating, but, this means less falls, more enjoyable ride, and more confidence. And that's good enough for me. =)
My New Ride =)

Monday again

Woke up feeling really lousy and tired actually. Felt it was going to be a long long day. I was sore and woke up really late. I had missed my morning training time by the time i woke up. Then as usual, gave myself the excuse that i deserved a rest after yesterday's race. So didn't really do anything the whole day as well. Was basically lost in time.
Went for swimming training in the evening though. Did warm ups, then 6*200, then 10*50(25 any stroke, 25 frontcrawl) Did 200m cool down. Had dinner with the swimmers, then headed to a friend's place for his mum's wake. Met an old school mate there. Chatted a bit. Was rather late when i came back and decided to rest and sleep rather then blog.
Anyway, did an event on Sunday night. This really cute 12 year old girl! Amazing!

Virgin Race

Just came back from the NUS biathlon. I have completed my virgin race. If this was the initiation, then i guess i passed =) It was a great experience. But rather intimidating at the same time.
Reached pretty early. At 8.20am. My race wasn't till 9.45. But i figured it was my first race, i should head down slightly earlier to get myself acquainted with the place and surroundings. When i got to the place, i actually managed to get a parking space. So i figured it was going to turn out all right after all. Please dun ask me what does parking space have to do with the race. Just my really really warped thinking.
Walked towards the competition area, only to see hordes of people. That was the intimidating part. One. And since i was alone and all, not knowing many people, didn't even plan to meet anyone there, i just walked to the tent where i saw a lot of people queuing. Can't go wrong i figured. True enough, it was the registration tent and also the place to get our body markings. It was approximately at that point of time where i freaked out. I really just wanted to turn around and head back to the car and drive back home. I was scared. First, i hate crowds. Too many people. Of course East Coast park is big, its just that there were too many people gathered in a small area. And it just felt all uncomfortable. But the feeling soon went away, and i told myself, give it some time, it'll get better.
To my surprise, while i was queuing, i met my sec 3 cross country coach. Mr Winder. Haven't seen him since sec 3. And it felt better seeing a familiar face. But then, the next question that pop in my mind was, oh my.. he's such a strong runner. I'm screwed. That was the pessimist in me talking. Finished getting the body marking, walked to the transition area. Worse. More people crammed in a really small transition area. I'm not sure if all transition areas are that small. But it was really scary. Everyone got a small space to put their belongings. And once again, i thought, damn. Why did i sign up for this. I would have been better off at home sleeping. Intimidation part 2 was when i saw a lot of very fit women who all had markings on their body starting with 8. I knew they would be in the women's open. And they looked really tone and fit like they ran everyday just for the heck of it. And some of them came in their standard chartered marathon attire, some from other races. Some of them were dressed in their tri racing gear. Scary.
Anyway, met another friend at the transition area, and she was very encouraging. And slowly, i felt myself settle down. I wanted to go do some warm up, but was not sure, what i had to do. Or where to go. And i didn't want to stray too far away. So, just hung around the transitional area. Until i met one of the guys from the forum. He was real helpful and even helped my place my shoes, socks, cap, running gear, etc in the correct manner. He told me this was to minimise the transition time. Really thankful for his help. But honestly, at that point of time, i was just thinking, will i make it? Will i be able to finish it?
Finally, it was time to head to the starting area for me. The current looked a little overwhelming. And when the race started, it was horrible. Everyone else was trying to swim. And for the first 250m, i kept having to stop to see where i was going. Or stop coz i touched someone's leg. Or stop coz someone really close to me was kicking and i didn't want to get kicked. The next 250m, i kept away from the crowd, swimming on the outside. But there were still some guys who were completing their swim and they obviously cannot be bothered who they were kicking and where they were going. The last 250m of the first lap was an easy swim due to the fact that the current was helping us. The 2nd lap's first 250m was horrid for me. Kept swimming far out. And having to navigate my way back. But other then that, there were less people coz by then. So i would say the next 500m to the end was an easier swim. I remembered to switch to breastroke for the last 100m of so. Got out of the water with 4 other women. Of course every one of those 4 started running before me. Hee... Slow transition for me lah. But it's my first race and i had to tape my foot before running. But i felt a lot more comforted coz when i glanced out in the sea, i saw there were swimmers who were just starting on the last 500m. So i figured, as long as i kept running and not stop, i wouldn't come in last. =)
The running was alright. I doubt the distance was a full 10km. Think it was probably 9km or so. Anyway, since i have never ran the route before, decided to conserve energy and just follow what my ipod indicated. And there were some people from the forum who cheered me on while i was running. That made me feel better since the run is usually the tough part for me. Tried to average a 6min pace. But fell short a couple of times. And when i got to the last part, according to my ipod, it was only about 8.6km. But the marshall told me i had about 300m to go. So i opened up and ran to the finish. Was actually thinking of opening up in the last km coz i was still feeling strong. Oh well, it was fun. Finishing was worth it.
Although i didn't complete the swim in the time i set for myself, i guess based on the strong currents today, it was alright. More importantly, i finished the race, ran the whole 9 or 10km without stopping.


Timing:
Swim leg: Approx 39min ACTUAL 38:17
Transition: Approx 2 min
Run leg: Approx 55min ACTUAL 55:53
Total time: Approx 1hr 36min ACTUAL 1:36:10
Position: 19 out of 30

The confirmed timings will be out tomorrow. And i forgot to do a time split. So i'm estimating the timings based on memory. Will confirm tomorrow.
Race no, finisher's medal and Event Tshirt

Jittery, nervous and excited all rolled up

Didn't do very much today. Woke up with a horrible neck ache. And felt really tired. So decided to skip another day of workout and give myself much needed rest. So went back to sleep only to wake up at about 11am. Was still tired then. Not sure if i was tired coz i over slept or what. But had a really weird dream. In the dream, i was first training with the Safra people. Then suddenly, there was a switch of scene to a race then i had when i was in primary school. In the middle of the race, i felt like i had phlegm stuck in my throat. And somehow, i just couldn't get rid of it. I tried coughing really hard a few times, but didn't work. I woke up at that point. Hee.. Not sure what it means. Anyway, there was never such a race. But i remember in the dream, all my primary school team mates were present. But we were all grown up. Hmmm.. weird
Anyway, had lunch, then decided i needed to sort out the neck ache. So went for a massage. It was so so painful. Obviously i was aching quite badly and my muscles were really tired. Just that i didn't really know it. I just know i spent half the massage screaming in agony. The lady was pretty relentless. She just kept up whatever she was doing, all the time telling me that she hasn't used any strength yet. But all in all a rather interesting experience. Coz she stepped all over me. I doubt it helped my aching neck very much. But now my back feels like it can take a cow. She was pretty huge. Hee
Then went over to Superman's place to pai nian. He has been complaining that i have not gone to his place yet this Chinese New Year and his mum was asking as well, how come this year i didn't pop by. So went there, chatted a bit with Auntie and the wife. Superman was SLEEPING. Well, stayed till he woke. Didn't spend very much time chatting coz he was rushing off to Chingay. And after that, went to Balestier to check out some bikes, before heading to meet bro for dinner. Had dinner at Botak Jones. Meal was so-so only. But still think the beef is value for money. The cajun chicken was average. Probably won't order it again. But the burger was good, the ribeye was average. The US prime was really good. I didn't eat all of those today lah, just a consolidation from over the last few trips there. =)
in about 12 hours time, i would be in the middle of my race. NUS biathlon. And that explains for the title of this post. I'm jittery, nervous yet excited all rolled up in one. Please don't ask me how this is possible. I think i've never really liked to go into any of my races being unprepared. But i'm certain i'm really quite unprepared for tomorrow's race. It's a sea swim. And from all the horror stories i've heard about getting kicked, elbowed, goggles coming out in the sea, it surely is scaring me quite a bit. So after 2 laps of 750m, it will be the dreaded 10km run for me. I've done a total of 2 >10km run. One was exactly 10km, the other was 11.3km. There was one other run that was pretty close to 10km, but shy of a few metres. And all these runs, were done with sufficient rest and just go run, then finish run, stretch and rest. So tomorrow would be my serious first swim, plus run. And since i only have 2 previous run under my belt, i feel really unprepared. I can't even come up with a strategy for the run except to say i'm just going to run. Sounds silly.
So that accounts for the jittery and nervous part. The excitement part? Well, its a race. Races always excited me. =) I have this thing about competitions. Adrenaline is up, everything just looks brighter. And all those hours spent running and swimming makes it seem worthwhile during a race. And for this race, i actually have a number bib. The last time i wore a number bib was super duper long ago. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that i don't come in last tomorrow. Just have to stay focused and do my part. Will be starting the run at about 10.30, so it will be a hot run. Hopefully the sun doesn't shine in full force tomorrow. Coz truth be told, i have yet to run under the sun. Most of my runs are in the early morning, the late evenings or in the gym with the aircon. All righty.. Going to call it a night coz i seem to be constantly tired lately. Will update about the race tomorrow after i get back.
Cheers

Just another day

Woke up feeling all achy and muscles felt more tired then i imagined them to be. Considering it was a rather short workout last night, i was rather surprised. Anyway, woke up late as well. Guess i really was very tired. More tired then i imagined myself to be.
Decided that i should go for a swim after all although i was late. So, went to the pool. Didn't want to push very hard coz i was half deciding whether to swim or not. And while walking to the pool, i almost did a U-Turn to go back and rest. But, stuck to it, and decided to swim. Did 200 for warm up, before deciding on what exactly i wanted to do. So, decided to just swim. Minimum was to do 40 laps, and keep as close to 12 min per 500m as possible. Was off the mark by quite a bit actually. Finished the 2km swim in 48min 55s. And the 1.5km swim split was 37min 11s. Which means my last 500 was my fastest split. Not that it is very fast, just compared to the rest of the swim. Anyway, it seems that if i start off slow on my first 500m, then the rest of the swim is just slow. Coz i did a 12min 34s split for my first 500m. Well, will bear that in mind and remember to swim faster come Sunday.
After the long swim, did some work before heading to help dad out at Turf Club. I've been spending some time thinking of how best to help dad with his business. Haven't come up with anything great yet. But i guess i just have to be patient on this aspect.
Surprisingly, i did feel better after my swim. Somehow, the aches seem to have gone away. I'm hoping that it'll stay off. Not sure if i really want to do a short BRIC tomorrow though. Feel quite keen to go sea swimming. But, really, will decide when i wake up in the morning. =)
Cheers!

Happy Valentine's Day

It's been more then 3 years since i last started posting. I remember a Valentine's Day post that i did once. If my memory didn't fail me, i started this blog coz i wanted to vent some frustrations about COW.
3 Years down the road, i would say i spent a rather nostalgic Valentine's Day today. Why nostalgic? Coz it reminded me of the Valentine's Day i spent in 1997. It was RJC's cross country that year. Please don't ask me why they decided to hold cross country on that day. Maybe coz non of the other schools booked MacRitchie that year. And 11 years on, i'm back to running and i spent the day training. Not so much competition, but i spent the evening in the good company of new found friends and people who come together because they have a similar passion. Running!
I don't particularly love running. But i guess i'm alright at it. Running takes a lot of work, a lot of mileage. And for all the food that i put in my mouth, the no. of calories i burn during a run sure doesn't add up. But anyway, had an easy session today. Started with a 1.2km warm up, then 4 sets of about 1.1km. (5.31, 5.34, 5.45, 6.14) Yes. I notice a huge jump from the 3rd set to the 4th set. But, i was darn tired by then, and it took sheer will power and strength to finish the last set. Although i am sure if had pushed harder in the first round, i would probably clock a better timing. But then, i didn't. So no point thinking of the what if...
Oh before i forget, although Valentine's Day is officially over, Happy Valentine's to everyone. Then again, if you treasure those around you and show them you love them, then everyday is a Valentine's Day rite? Hee
But i guess the thing that has been on my mind today is really how come sometimes, the things people say in passing just stay on in your head way after the person has said it? I heard two comments today. One of which i liked, coz it was positive, and one which irritated me coz it wasn't so positive. I've always been an athlete. I would think almost all my life since i knew how to walk. I might not always win, or come in first, but one thing i know for sure, i always give my best in races and competition. And i train hard, sometimes harder then others around me, just so i can do better each time. I would say i'm lucky to have started young, to have built a strong base over the years. I'm also lucky to have long legs and decent length arms that help in my running and swimming. But, don't take away the credit from me. I put in many more hours then the average joe to get to where i am.
People around me have mentioned that i have improved. I like that. I like improvement. But i also know the curve starts off steeply before it flattens out. But while the average joe runs twice a week, i run more. I run harder. I push myself harder. Yes, one reason is because i have the means to do so, the other is just because i believe i can achieve much more.
There are others in the group that have been running for years. And they probably can do longer runs then i can. After all, the longest run i have done till date since i started training was 11.3km. So if i can keep the pace for 11.3km, then in my book, i'm doing good. And just because some other guy has been running for a long time, doesn't mean anything to me. Maybe i've got better built. Maybe i'm more athletic. Maybe i just put in more hours. Maybe i push harder. I don't know if i can do the same pace for 20km or 43km for that matter. I haven't even done my first marathon.
Anyway, if you've read my rantings this far, then the story above was about the not so positive comment. I mentioned i would like to have a base program at training today. When i started joining the recreational group, they told me that it would take me 6 months to join the main group. That it takes 6 months of conditioning and to build base. I totally agree. I would never want to jump the gun, injure myself, sit out for the rest of the season and not progress. So am i wrong in saying that maybe going back to the recreational group might be a good idea?
Oki, after i've wrote it out and put things in perspective, it seems silly now. But thats me.
Somehow, i feel tired today. More tired then i usually am.. Hmmmm
Write more tomorrow.. Nitez

Guilty pleasures

Spend the whole day grumpy. And had to force myself to get some rest. So no training. And it actually felt weird coz i was pretty psyched up to train. Anyway, i turned to my next comfort other then GOD and training. And i had like 6 meals today. Full meals. Comfort food. Hee =)
Now i'm feeling all guilty for pigging out and not training. But i guess this is like Chinese New Year for me. Coz while everyone else was pigging out, i was nursing a sore throat. So it's payback time.
Went down to NUS to pick up my race bib for Sunday's race. It's truly been a long time since i had a race bib or a race number tag. My virgin no is 8002. Which seems like a nice number i guess. But picking up the race bib and going back to NUS really brought back lots of memories. As i entered the NUS SRC carpark, there was a group of people starting out their run. And i remembered all those times where we ran there. I remembered inter-hall road relay. The crazy arts slope. Ouch.. But then again, i was probably a lot fitter then.
Anyway, i'm sure this race bib will be the first of many more to come. I used to keep my race bibs when i was in school. And i'll write on the back of the race bib my timings for the races i took part in, and the position i came in, in. And i would keep them and i remembered always loving to write the word PB next to any of the competitions i took part. And since this is my first official race bib for the biathlon, i get to write PB on it. Hee.. =) There are 35 women taking part in the full distance. So not many competitors in my wave. The only draw back is my wave starts at 9.30. Which means when i hit the road to run, it'll at least be 10 plus. Which also means it'll be hot and the sun would be out. And the bad thing is, i'm not conditioned to run in the sun. Most of my runs have been in the evenings or early morning where the sun is not out. Can't run tomorrow morning, so will have to fit in one last run on Friday morning before resting on Saturday. Although i would have very much liked to rest Friday and Saturday.
I think my flu is going away. But the pain at the side of my chest is still there. Not sure why. Might just be a muscle that has been overstretched.
Well, lots of food today. No workout. Which means i put in a lot more then i used today. Will work hard to rid it tomorrow.

Target for NUS biathlon is first and foremost to finish the whole race.
To complete the 10km run without stopping to walk.
To finish the swim within 40 mins.
To finish the run in 63 min.
To take less then 5 min for transition.

Rest Day

Woke up. Legs feel like lead. Body aching. Arms hurting. Am totally amazed at how the long run actually worked muscles that i never thought i had. Conclusion, today is rest day. Too damn tired and achy to do anything. Not even going to consider doing any training today. Rest rest rest..

Just feel like blogging, so decided to add to my earlier post. Somehow, things just didn't feel and seem right today. Was tired physically and mentally and feeling a little emotionally drained although i was pretty certain nothing major happened. I would know if it did right? After all, its my life i'm talking about. But somehow, it felt like a low day all morning and afternoon. And decided that i needed some inspiration or something positive to perk me up. Went to the usual sites for inspiration. Usually, after i visit the lifecoahes blog, i generally leave feeling happier and more up beat. But somehow, after surfing through the posts and all, i was still feeling down.
I really can't quite place my finger on exactly what is irritating me or bugging me. Or maybe all i really need is some solid time spent with my pillow. Oh well, if i figure it out later, i'll write.

Finally something that lifted up my otherwise crappy day still

Lyrics - In Christ Alone

In Christ alone will I glory
Though I could pride myself in battles won
For I've been blessed beyond measure
And by His strength alone I overcome
Oh I could stop and count successes
Like diamonds in my hand
But those trophies could not equal
To the grace by which I stand

Chorus:
In Christ alone I place my trust
And find my glory in the power of the cross
In every victory let it be said of me
My source of strength, my source of hope is Christ alone

In Christ alone will I glory
For only by His grace I am redeemed
And only His tender mercy
Could reach beyond my weakness to my need
Now I seek no greater honor
Than just to know Him more
And to count my gains
But losses to the glory of my Lord

Chorus:
In Christ alone I place my trust
And find my glory in the power of the cross
In every victory let it be said of me
My source of strength, my source of hope is Christ alone
(2x)

Longest run so far

Went for training eventually. Actually had little incentive to miss training. Except the irritating flu that doesn't go away when i'm not training. But when i'm actually training, it doesn't really bother me much, until the point where i am stretching, then i need the tissue. Hee
Anyway, left work slightly early to head to Geylang East Swimming complex. Was worried that it would be some run down neighborhood swimming pool. But when i got there, i was amazed at how little people swim there despite the fact that it is really nice. Then again, it could be the fact that it was like 5.30pm and most hardworking people were still at work. Anyway, saw a familiar face there. One of the lifeguards that used to be at NUS pool. And i guess i don't have a forgettable face, although i have a common face. Anyway, we chatted for a while. Didn't feel good to just start swimming especially since i remember i use to chat with him and Ken in NUS quite a bit. But i was running short of time. Coz i only budgeted 45 min for the swim and knew i had to get to Toa Payoh by 6.30pm.
Did only 100 for warm up. Then did two sets of 500. Both below 12 mins. Which isn't good. But i realized how tired my arms were and how out of shape i felt. Anyway, by the time i hit the pool, it was 5.50. And by the time i finished the two sets, it was like 6.20. I knew that was it. But at least i swam a little. Does that sort of make it a BRIC training?
Went for training after that. The usual guy who leads the recreational run is in HK running the marathon. So, there wasn't really anyone who wanted to lead the recreational run. Anyway, Samuel said i could do the same route i did last week, probably about 9km. So i said, what the heck. Will just run with the main pack. And there were so many people today, i figured there would definitely be people equally slow like me. So i won't feel as bad making them wait for me.
Felt good in the first 2km or so. And when i reached the traffic junction, i had a mini debate with myself whether i should do the 11km route or the 9km route. But i figured since there were still like at least 10 people behind me, i'll try the 11km route and see how it went. And i figured if i kept a steady 6'30 pace, i would be able to finish the run, albeit a little slow. It was rather heartening seeing others that run with the main pack just slightly in front of me, so i decided to push on. The killer was not in the run, coz many people were actually running with me. But the killer was when i had to climb the overhead bridge. Whoa... running was ok. Climbing... Ouch... Now i wonder how people do the vertical marathon. Maybe when i get fitter, i will give it a shot too, just coz i'm a pain addict. Haa
But when i finished crossing the overhead bridge, which i practically crawled up, i felt a sharp pain at my right chest. I was a little worried actually coz i felt like i was doing an easy pace and wasn't really pushing. So where did the pain come from? Then i remembered i had the FLU. And suddenly, i was really really worried. Like would i drop dead from the run suddenly. I know i'm like super melodramatic and paranoid. But 1000 and 1 things were running through my head when the pain persisted. Like it's really my fault. Should have known better.. Shouldn't have been training with the flu. But then again, i was going at a really easy and comfortable pace.. =(
Well, the fact that you're reading this posting only means that i finished the run without collapsing. (Hmm.. was that a complex equivalent??) But at that point of time, i was pretty worried. Really. So, when one of the guys asked if anyone wanted to take the shortcut, i happily agreed. Only to find out after that the shortcut is like only 300m shorter. But the 300m shortcut also meant that i didn't have to climb another overhead bridge. So no climbing is good. And after taking the shortcut, i actually managed to merge with the mid-end pack. Mentally, it felt good. And i was rather pleased with myself. Of course, i would have felt a greater sense of achievement if i had done the whole full route. But, it's a good enough effort for my longest run yet. Ended the session with some stretching and of course it was at this point where the nose started to get drippy.
Well, long post here. But i'm really glad. Makes me feel a little more comfortable with the 10km run this Sunday. My target is to do the 10km in 63min. If i manage to do it in 60min, then its a bonus. But more importantly, the aim is to finish the race this Sunday.

Distance covered: 11.29Km
Time Taken: 1hr 13min 38sec
Pace: 6'31/km

Happy camper now needs to Zzzzz and recover. Probably will give my legs the well deserved rest, if not, then a maximum of 5km. And might do some intervals plus drills at the pool. But all will depend on how i feel when i wake up and am no longer high on endorphin.

Irritating flu

More rest makes me feel good. Makes me feel like a stronger swimmer except for the fact that at the back of my mind, i'm worried about the flu and the cough. And it refuses to go away. I've slept through practically the whole of Sunday. Did no workouts, missed spin class and my long run. And, it refuses to go away.
But i must admit i felt good in the water last night. I think it was the only place that my nose did not act up. Manage to complete the whole workout though. But honest to goodness truth is i didn't push very hard. Swam behind people for most of the workout. Yup, cheated by drafting quite a lot. So managed to conserve energy till the end of the swim. But even then, didn't really do the last sprint.. would say it was probably a 60% effort.
Anyway, started with warm up 200, then 200 with pull buoy, then when everyone reach, another 200 warm up. Then did 5*200, 5*100 ( 25 breastroke, 75 frontcrawl) then 5*100 ( 50 sprint, 50 easy) And ended with 200 cool down.
Quite a lot of people that i never saw before turned up for the swim session last night. Apparently coz this guy called Joe was back from Shanghai. Boy, can he talk. I'm sure he maxes out his 860 word limit capacity each day without fail. Anyway, went for dinner after that before going off to meet a client for a missing signature. Thank goodness my client was really understanding about it.
Didn't do anything the whole of this morning in terms of workout. Came to office early to get work done, only to realize coz i switched bags, i forgot to bring my keys along. Which means all my files are stuck in the cupboard. Sigh. That's the problem with no secretary keeping the spare key for you. What i used to take for granted, i'm learning to appreciate now. Maybe i should make a spare set of keys and keep them in office. That should be helpful. So, headed home after clearing up some leftover computer work, and submitting the forms.
Wanted to swim, but still doing the very fine balancing act this whole week, of rest more or train more. Maybe i'll train till Thursday and rest all the way till Sunday for competition?
Haven't decided. But i reckon about 6-7 sessions this week is good. Already done 1. Another 5-6 more. Still thinking whether i will run tonight though.. Maybe an easy run.. Need to get those legs working..

Rat Year

Nothing to do with training today as i basically slept the whole day away. It was a slow weekend actually. But i guess good for the sick me who always believes sleep cures flu. Hee..
But was up till 5 in the morning the night before trying to win money from playing blackjack. Every year, i head to this friend's place to try to win some money. It must have been 4-5 years back where i started with $5 and ended the night with $500. Last night, wasn't so lucky. Started with $10. Played consistently per hand and after 4 1/2 hrs of playing, walked away with $90. So i suppose if you take $90 divide it out by 4.5hrs, that was my hourly rate. Pathetic i know, but all in the name of fun for Chinese New Year. But what i forgot was that i was up since 6 plus on Saturday morning to swim with the trifam people and didn't manage to squeeze in nap time coz i was busy reading, and when i actually finished the book, the relatives were here already and had to go show face and make small talk. But, that's Chinese New Year.
The book that i just finished reading, Brad Metzler's Book of Fate was pretty good. Great plot with an interesting twist. I always think it's an interesting twist when the author manages to bring me to the end of the book without me realizing who the villian is. Or rather the ability to make me so absorbed in the book that i forget to look out for other villians. Hee.. But overall, a very good read if you are interested in thrillers. Anyway, his books are always interesting. Good mix of action, thriller, politics rolled into one.
Anyway, it's been some time since i last read. I'm only averaging 1 book per month now which is little by my standards. Yes. I know of people who read like 1 book per year, but then again, i use to read like 1 book per week, so now, i guess 1 book a month is little even for me. But whatever the case, i'm just glad i managed to find some time for the book.
Another good bike that i saw the other day was sold. I actually thought it was a steal at $1.3k considering the bike condition and groupset. But i guess some things are not meant to be and so, before i managed to get a reply back to the guy, the bike has been sold. But as usual, GOD is always kind to me, when one door closes, another opens. Have 2 more bike offers today, both bikes going for less then $1.3k. Just hoping that both bikes would have the groupsets that i'm looking for. If that is the case, then, i would surely be a happy camper.
Alright, i've rattled nonstop. It's time to once again go to rest, although i'm not sure if its posible to sleep after sleeping the whole day away, except to wake up for 2 meals. But, the runny nose is back and based on my theory, sleep gets rid of the flu, i'm heading to bed. Nitez. Happy Year of the Rat!

Sick on 2nd Day of Chinese New Year

Damn.. I'm sick. According to some, its coz i'm over training and not giving my body enough rest. Possibly, or it could be i didn't train for the last two days and my body was protesting.
Anyway, started with a runny nose yesterday. Then thought i caught a cold. The runny nose lasted all day while i was at Turf Club helping Dad. And when i came home, it still wasn't any better. And i was worried. Coz i really wanted to do the Tanjong Beach swim today. And i haven't trained in the last two days. So i decided to sleep early and pray hard that it would be sufficient. But, i tossed and turned all night and could barely sleep. Finally fell asleep at close to 3am. And considering i had to be up by 6.30 in the morning, i figured i'll probably miss the alarm and not wake up. But before the alarm went off, i was up. I hit the snooze button a couple of times and had a mini debate with myself as to whether i should go for training or not. Finally, i was awake. And decided, what the heck, will just go for the swim first, if i feel lousy, will skip the run today.
Did a easy 6 laps, ave abt 10min per 400m. So i guess that is about my usual pace. And after that, i felt alright, so went for the run. The nose threatened to get runny a couple of times, but after the first 2km, it went off until after the run. Did a 4.89km run. 28min 25s. About the same speed as my last Thursday run. But considering i swam about 2.4k before the run, i'm rather pleased. Just that i can't last.. Hee.. Last km was struggling.. Oh well.. Going to take a short nap now to rest before the relatives come over..

Happy Chinese New Year

First day of the Chinese New Year. Didn't work out today. Oh, on Tuesday, i ran 9.5km. Still the longest run i've done so far. Tiring, but definitely rewarding.
Went for a swim yesterday, didn't managed to finish the 30 laps before getting chased out of the pool. They were closing for Chinese New Year. Sigh. But my fault really for bad planning of time. Then went for a 5km run after that. Slow slow run. Wasn't feeling very good. But managed to explore some new places, will probably run those tomorrow.
Have made up my mind about the bike. I guess if i have to pay to learn lessons, then so be it. What can be solved by money isn't a problem at all. (forgot abt this motto a long time liaoz)
Went to gamble last night after reunion dinner. No win no lose. Went visiting today and decided to have an early night coz was up till 6 this morning, and i'm beginning to feel a little sick. Not too good to be sick so early in the new RAT year.
Happy Chinese New Year to one and all. Huat ah!
Happy Year of the RAT!!

More training less results?

The last time i felt this way was like two days before national schools in 1998. Damn. I feel like i'm putting in more effort but i'm getting worse. I guess i can attribute it to my changing my strokes for supposedly more efficient and effective strokes. But i can't help but feel that my timing is sliding. Anyway, went for a swim this morning, 200 warm up, 1500 easy swim (37min), 4*100 Pull buoy and 4*100 (50kick, 50pull) with pull buoy of course. 100 cool down. Not too shabby. But, i think i doing too many easy swims. Too much junk miles? Not sure. But will push harder at next training. Back tonight with running training.

run done

Finally did my 10km run. Time 1hr,8min. I guess i'm pretty pleased. Coz i have been putting it off for some time now. The pace actually felt really good and i wasn't pushing too hard. So, all in all, it was fun. Went for swim training. Today's training unlike the satisfaction of running was bad. Had a stitch while swimming. Now who gets stitches when swimming. Really pretty hilarious. But, when it stops u from swimming, and i so wanted to train, it wasn't funny any longer. I want to bring both my swim and run timings down. Preferably 30 min for the swim and 55 min for the run. If i can achieve this before Singapore Biathlon, i would have come a long way. But, like i said to someone today, the aim of the first race is to complete. =)
Didn't get very much done today though, other then running and swimming. Apparently, everyone is in Chinese New Year mode already and no one seems to be wanting to mit up for work stuff. Sigh.
On a more sombre note, a friend that i happen to know, his mum is in ICU. So, i will be praying for him and his family. Put him in your prayers. I happen to think he's a nice person.

Spring Cleaning??

Heard this over the radio yesterday. While people are busy spring cleaning their homes for Chinese New Year, how about spring cleaning your personal life?
That's an interesting thought. But i guess most people spring clean their personal life on the Eve of New Year's Day. And with Chinese new year just one month after New Year, it seems silly to spring clean once again. But i guess it gives me a time to look back at the past 1 month and ask myself if things have been going as planned. Well, answer to this very elusive question would be, training wise, i think i have made decent steps. But only at the expense of my work life. As for the other stuff that i've set out to do, i don't think i've really accomplished any of them.
Have told myself that i would go sit for some papers, but have not even registered for them let alone get the textbooks and start reading up on them. Have not done a lot of stuff at work which i said i would. The best thing for work that i did for January was probably sending out New Year cards to my clients and clearing up my desk and cupboard at work, filing away things that were last year old.. Hee..
Relationship with GOD is a slow process. But i guess one can never force a relationship. If that is one thing i've come to understand over the years. But of course, i'm sure there can be more effort and time spent on this aspect of building up the relationship.
As for school goals, have started surfing the different websites for different courses that i might be interested in or might want to take up. Since registration doesn't start till March, i still have some time for my all time favourite activity, procrastination.
Training wise, have been doing a decent job. Only thing on my list that warrants me a pat on my back. Have been working out rather consistently for the last month. Although i have not been exercising since Thursday evening. Today being Sunday, means i missed 2 full days of physical activity and i have not been swimming for 3 days. Will not be swimming today as well, so make it 4 days till tomorrow evening's swimming session. Will be going to the gym for spin class and will run after that, so all in all, this week, i would have managed to do 9 sessions, which is still less then my projected 12 sessions. But then again, (excuses) i've been having a little problem on my arm and shins, so i guess progression is good.
Well, some stuff that i really need to focus on this coming month would be time management and time allocation. Also, i need to be a lot more disciplined. As of now, i'm only doing things based on the big picture. Need to break it down to the little picture and sort of like work out a fixed time table so i can get more things done and stop wasting time.
I still haven't ran my 10km and race is 2 weeks from now counting down. Ha....
Went for my first spin class today. Tired manz.. =P Ran 5km after that. Worse. Conclusion, need to work harder

Didn't do anything today

Wah.. Whole week i keep saying i wanted to run 10km. But haven't done it at all and its friday already. Sighz. I didn't do anything today except to repair my cross country bike and go window shopping for bikes. And suddenly i feel damn poor. Saw a tri bike that i am seriously considering. Going to set me back 2.5k. I'm not sure how or when its going to happen. But definitely tempted. Haven't swam for two days, body is itching to swim. But i know i must rest.. So i've rested. Going to work out real hard this weekend. Or maybe not real hard. But will workout tomorrow and maybe do a brick on Sunday. Hee. Was supposed to do a brick today. But didn't. Sighz. Sunday i will do one. Nothng much to write except that i am damn poor... So many goodies that i want.. But not enough money.

Something just isn't right

Woke up this morning and tried to do an arm pull and realised the pain was pretty intense. So, decided to skip a day of swimming. And the whole day just felt weird after that. Funny how i've only been swimming consistenly for 3 days solid, when i miss one day, or knowing that i would not be swimming today and its not my rest day, i was super duper uncomfortable. Guess thats how good or bad habits are formed. So today i learnt that i all i have to do is start something and stick to it. After 3 days, it'll feel like i never missed a beat.
So, since i was up early and there was no swimming, and running training was at night, and i had nothing on till lunch appointment, decided to hop down and pamper myself to a nice massage. Boy was it solid! Was a little painful at the start, but as the hour wore on, i began to relax a lot more and i didn't even know i was sore at certain places until after the rub down. And i didn't realize just how tired i have been. How my muscles were actually aching. So i guess the break from swimming was worth it.
Went to work after that. Spent the afternoon distracted coz not sure if i wanted to go for training in the evening. My shins are acting up AGAIN. But after careful consideration, plus the fact that i felt already quite bad for not swimming, i decided to JUST DO IT. hee..
So, i went for training and ran 5km. The only good news for the day was i did it in 29min and 33s. Which means i've finally gone under 30mins for 5km. Which means also, this is my current personal best. Then again, training curves have always been exponential. Always great improvement up front, and it just gets harder after that. Hoping to shave off another 3-5min before Singapore biathlon. But then again, the target now is to clock longer runs. I'm actually rather worried with the shin splints and the fact that i have yet to run a full 10km and NUS biathlon is 2 weeks away. With the shin splints, i'm not sure if i'll be able to push as hard or run as much as i would want to. Sighz...
Anyway, was chatting with dad this morning when he sent me to work coz my bike was in office. Client sent me home last night. And, we were chatting about running and stuff. And he said, i remember u haven't had this shin problem for a long time eh. And i was like DUH.. of course i've not been having the problem. I haven't been running period. And here's his real optimistic reply. Well, it never stopped u from running while u were in school, so, i suppose it shouldn't bother u much now too. Haa... Just love the old man. Always hit the nail in the head. Yes, i will just have to tape up the area and run. I really need the mileage more then anything now. Might go 10km tomorrow morning, easy run. And go for a easy swim. Then do brick training on Saturday. Oh well, see how it goes. If the pain is real bad, like bad till i can't train, then i have no choice. But as long as it is not that painful, i will grit my teeth and run and swim. I really want to finish in a respectable time. =)

Satisfying training

Went for a run early in the morning before heading to the pool for a swim. Did a easy 5km run, thinking i was going to run more. But i didn't. Stopped at 5km. Time: 32 min 44s. So this is by far my best 5km run time. Which is pretty good for me. Was going at a pace of 6'59.
After that, decided to go for a swim coz i wasn't really tired. Did 300 warm up, 5*300. (6.36, 6.39, 6.42, 6.40, 6.45) 2 min rest between each set. As usual, my first lap is always my strongest lap where i can feel myself gliding and pulling. After that it becomes a blur. Did a minute for the first 50m of each set. After that, it just goes downhill. But i'm glad i've managed to drop to the 6plus region. I'm sure with more training and more work, i will soon be able to do a sub 6 min for my sets. Giving myself another 3-6 months to drop below 6. In the mean time, will work on shaving off precious seconds per set.
Today is the 3rd day that i've managed to fit in a run and a swim. But something is definitely bugging me. For a long time now, i have not had shin splints. Then again, for a long time i have not been running. And i half suspect they are back. But will only know when i run tomorrow. But 80% certain coz when i squat or walk, i can feel it. Damn..
Totally off the topic of training, something happened between Guardian and i today. Before you let ur imagination run wild, we didn't meet up. We had a conversation over sms. But in one of the sms, it suddenly brought me 10 years back, to nov 1998. And i can only cringe and once again question my own judgement of man. And more importantly, the fact that i have loved a man so blindly for so long. Blinded by love that doesn't even make sense, to a glaringly obvious flaw. It was a little painful. But i'm sure with so many things to look forward to, the pain will subside. =)

Another good day

Ha.. Just ended another day where i managed to fit in two sessions. Swam in the morning and ran in the evening. Although overall, i think i did less then i did yesterday. Woke up late this morning. Dad came into my room to ask if i still wanted to swim. And i woke up in a start. Didn't hear the alarm clock, bio clock didn't work either. And when i moved my arms, OUCH. I was really aching. So decided to do a easy swim.
Swim:
300 warm up
5*100 pull buoy
1.3k easy swim (36 min)
200 cool down.
Then i wanted to rush out to go to office after that. But tot i had time to sneak in some food first. Big mistake. It started to pour straight after that. So, did as much work as i could at home in front of the computer. And cleared the files that i brought home from work. Reminded clients of some outstanding stuff. And soon it was like 4pm. And i realised just how hungry i was. And i remembered, i didn't eat LUNCH. It was cool that dad was on the way home, and he called. So he packed me noodles. Yum yum. And the yong tau fu that i like from chinatown. However, when he got back, it was late. Like 5.15pm. And i had to run by 7pm. I knew i shouldn't have eaten, but i just can't resist good food. So i finished the noodles, and i knew i was in trouble. I was super duper full. Anyway, turned up late for running and everyone else had left for the run. So went to the track to look for any familiar faces around. And the group wasn't there as well. But bumped into this new girl. So went for a run with her. Did a slow run coz she said she it was only her second run. Was hoping to do track work today. But i guess i could save my strength and do a long run tomorrow. So, went for a 5.5km run with her. Took 38min. And just as we headed back to TP, the guys had finished their runs already. So, showered and went for dinner with them.
I've been thinking abit about whether it is feasible for me to do my Ironman this year. Or should i wait to do it next year. Couple of pros and cons. And the smart thing would be to focus more on my runs this year, clock more mileage, do easy races this year as a guage, and then go for timings next year. Sounds like a more ideal plan. But truth is, its really tempting to sign up for the year end ironman. Just coz many others are also doing it. And i think it'll be a ball to go together. And if they do it this year, it generally means they won't go back to the same place next year. Hmm.. Tough choice. Anyway, i have up till jun to make up my mind.
So i've done the water fiesta on Saturday.

Upcoming races would be:
NUS biathlon 17 Feb
Singapore Biathlon 1 March.

Then i have a huge gap till OSIM triathlon and Aviva Half Ironman.
Army half marathon
Standard Chartered Masters Swim
And finally the Standard chartered marathon end of the year.

Other races i'm thinking of would be Lion City Marathon. Might do another Triathlon such if i can find it. And probably one more run/aquathlon.

Haven't really gotten it planned out yet. But i'm hoping to not have too big a gap between races coz i would lose focus and get bored. Ha...

Eh.. thats about it. I'm actually quite impressed about my posting rate for the month of Jan. Must not be working hard enough. .... =P

Super start to the week

Feel great today. Mainly for many reasons!
I finally tried out my nike plus sensor and shoes. And i did 7.56km, time 53min56sec, at a pace of 7'07". My ipod told me all this info! Ha.... Anyway, ran on the treadmill coz two times this morning, i put on my running gear, grabbed my stuff, all ready to run, and it started to drizzle. Usually i love running in the rain. But new gear, so wanted to keep it dry. Went to office after that, managed to actually get quite a bit of work done! So that brightened up my day.
Then finally, highlight of Monday evenings, went for swimming training. Reached late coz got held back, so didn't manage to fit in a warm up. Started off with 3*100 front crawl pull with butterfly kick. It was horrible for me coz i suck at coordination. But just took it as my warm up, so swam easy. Then did 5*100 with pull buoy. Then did 2*50 kicking, (my favourite). After that 3*200 easy, and 4*100. And cool down 2*100. Why i enjoyed today's workout was coz there was no timing involved so everything was swam at easy pace. And the longest distance we swam was 200m. Haa... Went for dinner after that.
So, it was a great run, great swim. Plus i lost 2kg since the last time i weighed. Andi have new gadgets. And new friends.
Oh, plus Guardian called. So, super start to the week =)

Eventful day

Woke up early this morning, partly due to the fact that i was nervous and didn't sleep well. Oh well, its been a long long time since i could say i took part in anything. And considering this is my first ever biathlon, i was nervous yet excited at the same time. Reached the pool, realized that there were many people taking part in the biathlon. Kids, adults. Whoa... By this time, i was jittery already. As usual, 1 million and 1 crazy thoughts flew past my head with the most prominent one, what if i come in last?
There wasn't really anyone i knew when i reached. So it felt like one of those obscure races i did when i was younger. And i didn't really know anyone or they were way older then me. Except this time, there were lots of people my age just that i didn't know them. But then again, i'm new. So i guess after a couple more races, i'll start seeing more familiar faces. My race no was 426. Didn't manage to get my swim timing. But i reckon i was doing about mid 18-19 min. And the run time was 34.46. So i made the run but didn't make the swim. But can only confirm after the 15th when the results come out. My transition was slow. Need to work on that. Plus, i have a lot of abrasions. So i really need to get proper and decent gear. But all in all, very fulfilling. Tired as hell though...
And i have a new scar to show off for my first ever biathlon. I really think i'm quite a klutz. Wonder how i survived sports all those years growing up. Always a new injury every time. Anyway, after the swim, while i was climbing out of the pool, i lost my balance, fell and scraped my hand against the floor. And the floor was really rough and so some skin came off. And it was bleeding while i was running. But i'm glad i completed the race. And i'm even more impressed about how much i really wanted to do it, coz i don't remember the pain at all throughout the run leg. It was only when i was showering did i begin to feel the pain. Either i was super charged with adrenaline or my nerves take way too long to register. Haa...
Came back, took a short nap. Then it was time to go for Marcus' wedding.
Met quite a couple of school mates as the bride was from the same secondary school. Small world. And the more amazing thing was that Marcus' parents still remember me. Faint.. Guess i haven't changed all that much since primary school. As usual, it was a great catch up session although i am pretty certain i underpacked in the ang pao department. Packed the SOP amount. But after dinner, i felt like it wasn't enough. Wanted to get another ang pao and all chip in. (those pri sch mates at the table) But then we decided since they are a rich family, its fine. Haa... What an excuse.

Had a great time in general. Decided to come straight home after the wedding. Hoping to do a short run tomorrow before heading out for a lunch appointment. Actually pretty excited to try out the new nike shoes and the nike+. Hope to catch a show tomorrow as well. Anyone hasn't caught the show American Gangster yet and would like to watch it?
All in all, i'll say today in general was a great day. Aside from the scar on the hand, the bad abrasions, i feel great. But today also showed me that i need to really improve on my run. Coz having a strong run leg is more advantageous then having a strong swim leg. Not that my swim is very strong lah.. But i think i need to be able to keep mid pack on the runs... Eh... i guess this is it. Nitez!

Updated 10 Feb: Race results were out although there was no specific breakdown of the swim, transition and run. My total time was 55 min 04s. I know i did my run in close to 35 min, and my transition was pretty long, so i suppose my swim was about 17min. There were 15 women competitiors, and i came in 10th. So i suppose for my first race, that is pretty decent!

Jitterbugs

I should be asleep and not blogging. But i couldn't sleep, so decided to drop a note. Damn.. i'm super jittery about the mini biathlon in a couple of hours time. Its been a real long time since i've actually felt this way. Jittery jittery.
And i can't sleep, thinking of the 1 million and one things that could happen. Like come in last.. Like can't finish the run after the swim.. scary.....
Anyway, i went for a easy swim this morning. Just did laps. Did about 26 laps in 34 min. Wasn't pushing myself coz i was tired. And i wanted to save myself for tomorrow.. meaning later.. Went to mit a client, closed a case, then went to office, then came home early coz wanted to sleep. Didn't ride, so took the MRT. Which was a mistake. No more MRT rides at 9 plus. Feels like being packed into a little corner of my room. Don't think i am claustrophobic. But i am certain i have no liking for crowds or many people. Of course i am known to be swayed by certain brands and will brave the crowd. But other then that, give me my bike any time manz.
So, came home and tried to sleep. Maybe i was trying too hard. But didn't work. Still not asleep. And i'm still scared.
Oh yeah, bought my ipod sensor today. So now i'm all ready to start running. A funny thought actually went through my head this afternoon. Its been a long long time since i wanted to put on my running shoes and just keep running. But i had a glimpse of that feeling earlier on. Guess i just have to focus on that and soon, i'll be doing my half marathons and hopefully, a full marathon that i complete. =)
Alright.. gg to hit the sack. I keep telling myself to do my own race tomorrow, and not be bothered about the timing. But i'm still scared as hell i'll come in last coz my run leg is slow. I think my swim is about mid pack. So its the run that i'm damn worried about. And i keep having this feeling that if people are slow or unfit, they wouldn't be crazy enough to sign up for a biathlon. So, what does that make me?
Nitez

Good workout

Had a great workout today. Swam in the morning and ran at night. Sounds like a perfect day, minus having to go to work in between.
Swim:
1*300m warm up
3*500m (12.28, 12.33, 12.35)
1*200m cool down.

Run:
1*1.2km warm up
2*2.4km easy (13.35, 14.02)
stretching and walking for cool down.

Eh.. nothing more to add except it was a good day and great workout =)

One hurdle crossed

Ha... Woke up early. But didn't run. Gave myself the excuse that i needed all the energy for tonight's time trials. Which is bullshit really coz the biathlon consist of the swim and the run. But, i'll run and swim tomorrow for sure.
Anyway, went in to office to get work done. And as usual, spent more time talking then working. This is horrible. But the more horrible thing is having to 'siam' the managers coz i am sick of everyone giving me their sales pitch of why their agency is the ideal agency to join. I just want to be left alone!!!!!!!!!!!
After work, headed down to Yishun Safra for the swimming trials. I think i super blur lor. I paid $3.2 to enter the pool. And the best part is, after i entered the pool, a life guard stopped me.
Lifeguard, "Hey girl, you here to swim? Pool close 4 lanes.'
Me, "I came for the swim trials.'
Lifeguard, "Then why you pay to come in?"
Me, "Dunno. Coz never pay cannot come in mah. And i don't have a safra card."
Lifeguard, "Ask me mah. Then i let you in. Next time you come, and i around, you can ask me let u in ."

Haa.. My free Safra entry. Except that i bloody stay 25 minutes away by bike. And the swimming pool behind my place is a 3 minute walk. Haa...
Anyway, there were only 4 of us for our slot. Two guys, one girl and ME. And it was pretty scary. Coz i reached early, wanting to warm up. But then, the guy suddenly came to tell me that we could start early. So, did a little stretching before jumping into the pool.
So, this girl was next to me, and i decided to follow her pace. She chiong right from the start. And i stupidly followed. But after 6 laps, i was gone manz. I couldn't pull, my legs felt like lead, and i was hurting. So i switched to breastroke for 4 laps, before changing pace and went back to front crawl. I am pleased with my overall timing, but i guess the effect of the swim was pretty bad. I stopped every 50m to blow bubble 3 times before carrying on. Somehow, i don't think it is very healthy, coz eventually, i would have to swim the whole course without stopping. Anyway, that is my next target. I'm just glad this time trial is over and i did it within the time frame that i set yesterday.
Final time: 35.33min. 1.5km

Next mini target is to do 17 min at this Saturdays water fiesta for 750m swim, and 35 min for 5km run.
And i have time trials on Sunday again for NUS biathlon. Sighz....
One step at a time, one step at a time

Easy workout

Did an easy workout today. Didn't swim like i planned to, coz of all the errands i had to run. Plus i woke up late. Ok, not really late, but i rolled back over to sleep. Ha..
Anyway, went for a short run in the evening, did about 4.5km in 28.33. Not as fast as i'll like it to be, but i'll guess it'll have to do for now coz i have so not been running for more then a week. And if the timing is slow, i guess i get what i put in. Anyway, time trials is tomorrow, so doing my best not to get myself too tired. Am aiming to do the time trials in 36 mins. Keeping my fingers crossed. Will kick harder.. =)
Rest of the day went by in a blur, with loads of stuff to do and buy. Spent a bomb today. And so i guess i'm done for shopping for a while. Haven't seen any nice jerseys i want to buy yet. So that's good. Gotten most of the stuff i need already, short of the ipod device for my new running shoes. But that will probably have to wait till the next pay check comes in. But i'm really quite excited about the new shoes. Have come to a conclusion that the blisters i get on my left foot, has nothing to do with the shoes i wear. So i improvised and just taped up the part of the arch that was getting blisters. No blisters today, but since its a slow run, not quite a good guage.
Oh yeah, i ran on the track today. Shit. It is still as boring as ever. This Saturday when i do that mini biathlon thing, it is going to make my mind go on overdrive from the boring run. But, since it is my first race for 2008, and my first race for biathlon, hopefully the adrenaline will outweigh the monotony.(Is that how it's spelt?) Ok. Enough for tonight, going to crash and hopefully wake up for a 5.5km run. Time trials in the evening!!!!!

One step forward, two steps back

I think this is like the story of my life. Ha...
Anyway, sorry i lied about being back on Saturday. Wasn't really in a mood to write. =P
Well, woke up, went to work, and then went for swim training. Did 400m warm up, then 750*2 (17 min, 18 min) and 100 warm down. Technically, if i do this same timing for my swim trials on Wednesday evening, i should clear the trials. Anyway, i didn't train the whole of last week except for that crappy swim session on Monday. So, i'm almost close to being back on ground zero. Damn...
I signed up for NUS biathlon and the water fiesta. So, that means two more races before Singapore Biathlon. And i need to work my ass off so i can afford a decent tri bike by March. =) Anyway, only other thing to add is Guardian is dating someone. Or rather, in his words, seeing someone. Yeah. It affected me. But right now, i am darn glad i have the time trial, and the race this Saturday to keep me occupied. So, i'll pen down how i feel probably after the time trial. But i did ask myself how many more times am i going to give him the power to hurt me... =(