Tuesday, November 29, 2005

End of Kids Camp 2

End of my second Kid's camp. Coaching 10 days in a row has truly been a stretch. I guess i really am tired. Despite the tiredness, it truly has been touching and emotional. And it has been extremely fulfilling. I am impressed with myself and i guess there is a part of me that returns to my childhood and once again, at closing, a million what if questions come to mind.
The camp has been an emotional roller coaster for me. It really brought me through a range of emotions in such a short time. It's scary and all. But i guess i did enjoy myself.
While at camp, i had time to do some internal reflections. A question someone posted me, set me thinking. Is this how it was meant to be? I'm certain the answer is no. And yet, i am not yet certain how i am suppose to turn the situation around. That will take time.
Superman is away in Manila attending the sea games and watching Lester compete. As for him, he is away in Bangkok. Its been such a crazy camp that i've not spoken to him for days and i miss him. Truth be told, i guess i don't mean a lot to him as well. Each time he is back, he doesnt bother to find me or even call to chat.
Will lament later.. now just want to get some sleep, and in my dreams, think of the what ifs. And also, the question of if i will find the courage to walk away.

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