Wednesday, June 18, 2008

My Favourite Wife - Tony Parsons

Just finished reading the book My Favourite Wife by Tony Parsons. He was the same author that wrote Man and Boy, Man and Wife. Most of his books revolve around the family unit and the problems that modern men and women encounter today against the contrast of old school love in a family unit. He constantly manages to bring out genuine emotion from the scenes that he is writing about.
To give a brief summary of what the book was about, it was in fact about a man who uproots his life from London to head to Shanghai with his wife and daughter for hopes of a better life, better pay, better work. In Shanghai, he is faced with temptation and Tony Parsons takes us through the changes and internal turmoil that he is facing. The protagonist of the story, a man named Bill would eventually find his life and his family being threatened by temptation and opportunity. He would slowly see himself evolve into the very sort of person he disliked in the first place. And his story tracks the path that he chose, the mistakes that he made, the power and beauty of the wedding vows and the very essence of what a marriage is supposed to be.
The book also discusses the issues and feelings of the China women who were usually mistresses of wealthy men, chinese or otherwise, who had come to Shanghai to seek their fortunes. While some of them bring along their family, many come to Shanghai for extended periods on their own. And so they set up these women in luxurious apartments and visit them on days that they fancy. Is there really true love between these women and the men that set them up? Does every story of the mistress end on a sad note? Again, Tony Parsons manages to bring across the stories of why they choose to do the things that they have done. These women. Why they chose to be mistresses. For them, it is more a sense of survival, or being practical. It also shares of their sorrow. Who would want to be second best?
There are probably a lot of excerpts in the book that i found that i felt was very interesting. But then again too lazy to pick and post, coz then, this would seem like a book review! And i'm so way past that =P
Anyway, the book is good, so do go pick it up if you think you might want to understand more about relationships. Or you could borrow the book. Although in the book, many times, it was emphasized that the women did it more so for practical reasons rather then for love, you cannot stop but to wonder if at some point of time, they did fall in love. They did believe that one day, the man that they were with would leave his wife to be with him. That instead of it being just a 2 year posting fling, they would after 2 years leave their wifes to be with these women. But what was interesting is, when the relationship turned into real love, that was probably when things and issues became more complicated. While at the beginning, it was merely a business transaction, it has progressed into love.
These women express themselves and their thoughts and feelings through the life and shoes of Li Jing jing, one of the female characters in the book.
I suppose when anyone dates a married man, there will always be certain rules to the game where you would have to play by. You would know that occasions would be spent alone or with fellow friends. That feeling totally at ease in the company of each other would be via short getaway trips and holidays. That you never really stop looking over your shoulders. That you wonder when the wife would find out and come to the apartment and throw out all your things. Or when the guy was due to be posted back and you would realize that one day, he has stopped calling, texting, stopped turning up. But the rules of the game was simple. You basically get a part time husband, part time boyfriend etc. Don't ask for more then what you have been given. Coz if it could be done, or it could be given, it will. But if it cannot be done, why ask for it then? Li Jin JIn knew that Bill was never going to leave his wife. And she told him she wanted his baby. A reminder of their love together. And i felt sad when i read this. Because just so many women believe in this. And what was scary was, if i was in her shoes, i would probably have felt the exact same way. Although i might not have done the exact same thing. =P
Anyway, great book, great themes, great discussion points. Well worth every cent that i paid for the book!

No comments: