Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Blue blue Tuesday

So Monday Sucked. Tuesday wasn't any better.
Another oh so crappy day at work. Left office at 6.45p, thinking i had more then enough time to head home, shower and meet my darling. But the jam was so horrid. It took forever to get to pie. And upon reaching pie, traffic crawled at a pace that was so unbelievable. I reached Toa Payoh at 7.20. And knew that i would not be able to meet Darling. But i so wanted to. But figured he was suppose to meet his client at 7.30. So no way would i make it. And i would make him late. So reached home about 7.40. Too late to join him, too late to go for training.
Texted him to ask if he was going to meet me. But he just sms to say if i have program, ownself go ahead. But i really wanted to meet him. Debated with myself for a while whether i should ride to meet him, so after his appointment we could meet up. But decided against it. Then finally, he replied my sms, then say he going to watch movie. Sighz. I would have so wanted to catch a show with him. Then i ask him who he watching movie with, then he say watch alone.
It bugged me a little i suppose. If appointment end liaoz, then why he don't want to meet me leh? Why he rather go watch movie alone? Is it because i'm not important enough? Then he also know i have been wanting to watch movie with him together. But every time we are out, he either meet up late, we need to meet other people, or we need to have an early night coz he has to work the next day. But when he is alone, he can go watch movie. i suppose my questions will not be answered. And at times when i try to tell him that i'm unhappy or upset, he will say i'm too emotional. I have no idea also.
Maybe i am too emotional. Maybe i care a lot more about him then he does. Maybe because our times always revolve around his time. That first when he gets leave to go out, then we can meet up. That when he don't have, we can't meet. so that's why i view our time as precious. That's why whenever he is free to meet me, i make an effort to accommodate his time and spend time with him. But maybe, it's just me. Maybe i'm the only one who wants him and needs him.

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